Intearction with brothers? Need help!

[Ra_bia]

:sl:
I am doing electrical engineering in a renowned university in Pakistan. At my university, I frequently find myself in situations where I have to deal with men like working together in groups on a project, doing practicals in labs or participating in class discussions. I am also aware that in my professional life I would have to deal with men. As I have always studied in female institutions and have no brother of my own, I have no idea how to deal with men and find it very awkward to talk and communicate with them. Please tell me how to interact with men in an appropriate and polite but impersonal way so that I can control such kind of situations!

[tigerkhan]

lol its remind me my university time. i graduated from UET peshawar electrical engineering.
to ur qst, i suggest. use hijab, 2nd never let anyone misunderstood about u. rest no pbm. we were last batch in annual system. blv i talked to only and only 2-3 girls in all my universiy life. but i know in semeter system this interaction is much more. it seems ur in first semester, hopefully u will be adjusted.

[Ra_bia]

Thanks brother. Yeah you are right- I am doing second semester at LUMS so I'm really not that used to interact with men. And I do take Hijab but still don't feel comfortable. Sometimes I feel like I'm making men feel awkward by being shy myself.

[aadil77]

just be firm and to the point, that way no one will get any ideas

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[CosmicPathos]

yes especially with the kind of men you have at LUMS, you should really be firm in your hijab.

Just be firm and try to not talk to the opposite gender unless you have to. But also be assertive and confident when you are required to talk.

[tigerkhan]

Thanks brother. Yeah you are right- I am doing second semester at LUMS so I'm really not that used to interact with men. And I do take Hijab but still don't feel comfortable. Sometimes I feel like I'm making men feel awkward by being shy myself.

anyway maybe u are feeling urself bit ackward and stranger by wearing hijab and sitting alone and qiute, as i dont know much about lums atmoshphere but heard that its much mod. sister be firm on our islamic values and commandement. blv i used to wear turban in university and never care what ppl think of this. i know its bit difficult in such atmosphere to stay aside and keep urself away from bad practices in normal atmosphere of universities. but u need to strength ur eman and faith and insh all will be easy.

[Tilmeez]

This reminds me of my days at Karachi University back in '99 - '02.

There was a sister of a very strong character. All of the boys and even male teachers were afraid of her. She was such strict we would doubt her strictness for rudeness. I, now, know it wasn't rudeness but her strong character that she never spoke to a brother in tender voice even she would ask for help in plain tone. She never mingled with rest of "Open Minded" girls and classmates and never took part in any Picnic or other parties arranged by students etc. She has always been active part of debate, speech, or literature related activity. She was one of the top 10 students of a 50 students' class and she would never miss a class and do his work on her own which would help her alot.

May Allah SWT bless her and preserve her, Inshallah.

My advise to my sister Ra-bia, don't allow small/ un-noticed don'ts of Islam in your life and Allah SWT will protect you from bigger ones.

BTW LUMS is a nice institute for professional studies, regardless what people say about it or what environment it has.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

wa alaykum us-Salaam
wear proper hijab. dont speak to them unless necessary. when you do speak, dont soften your voice or anything like that. make your tone firm. basically follow Islamic guidelines.

if anyone messes with you, get your brothers on to him.

[Endymion]

:wa: Rabia :statisfie

I think the most important thing is to be yourself,be a person.You should know who are you and how to interact with people.Take people's advice but decide everything for you,yourself.If you want to follow the right path,you just need to know how Islam guide you in this matter and decision will become simple for you.Dont feel embarrass on your shyness,its not a bad thing.Haya is Iman.Dont care about people so much,just be sure whether you are right or wrong.Talk with your fellow male students where necessary.Confidnce is a good thing but a confident person does'nt always mean a right person.Just behave normal,its just a begining.Every thing will be normal and fine slowly and gradually :)
Good Luck :statisfie