Seeing that there are quite a few marriage threads around, i'll add one...
What questions would you ask a potential partner?
This question has been on my mind for a while, and i know that it will depend on the persons but, on the whole which are questions that will help you get a better understanding of the person and his/her likes or dislikes?
All of the posts sound like a proper job interviews! I can imagine people getting worked up about these situations and cracking under the stress .
format_quote Originally Posted by Muezzin
3) Who would win if a pirate and ninja fought?
^^ lol. Obviously an crucial question, that must be answered correctly.
On a serious note, probably questions about the future, and how they deal with stress and things like that. Nothing too much.
‘Say: If the ocean were ink wherewith to write out the words of my Lord, sooner would the ocean be exhausted, even if We added another ocean like it.’~Al Qu'raan (18:109)
Edit: OMG Amat al Wadud you will need a week to get answers to all those questions
I know
But I getting married innit, cant marry any old Tom, Dumb or Harry
WassalamuAlaykum
P.S I'm kiddin, I copied them from somewhere, I'm not sure what I'd ask and I cant help but think I'd ask completely irrelevant questions due to nervousness :$
If she fails to answer these questions because of shock, she has an incompatible sense of humour and must find someone else.
If she fails to answer these questions because of laughter, she is my mother.
If she answers these questions seriously, she has an incompatible senses of humour and must find someone else. After I have withdrawn £200 from her bank account.
If she answers these questions jokingly, but fails to make me laugh, she is incompatible and possibly my father.
If she answer these questions jokingly and makes me laugh, it is a practical joke.
I thought it the women who are after the bank details.:P
format_quote Originally Posted by Amatul Wadud
I know
But I getting married innit, cant marry any old Tom, Dumb or Harry
WassalamuAlaykum
P.S I'm kiddin, I copied them from somewhere, I'm not sure what I'd ask and I cant help but think I'd ask completely irrelevant questions due to nervousness :$
:s:
Lol, thats true! That kinda what happened to my friend.
1. What are your reasons for wanting to get married (There are still people out there who do it because of pressure from parents)
2. Tell me a little about your relationship with your mom and sisters ( You can tell alot about a person from the way they interact and act towards their close family.)
3. What would be your expectations from a wife, and from marriage?
My question:
Will you provide me an endless supply of chocolate?
On a serious note, my eyes mught be too focused on the ground and I'd probably be looking really red, maybe brick red, maybe even worse.
On the subject, what's with all the marriage related threads? I thought Summer was the marriage season?
AssalamuAlaykum,
Hmmm...Tricky..!
Id ask whether he'd consider himself a religious person
Whether he prays his regular namaaz's..(On time)
Errr...
Id ask about his interests...Like & dislikes....
Urmm ...whether he's freindly and an outgoing person
Id also ask why he wants to get married...(Cz some can be clueless when it comes to marriage !) lol
& Id interigate the Mother-in-law as well....(Nah nt really...Thats rude)
Seeing that there are quite a few marriage threads around, i'll add one...
What questions would you ask a potential partner?
This question has been on my mind for a while, and i know that it will depend on the persons but, on the whole which are questions that will help you get a better understanding of the person and his/her likes or dislikes?
lol..interesting qn...not too sure exactly, but i do know that ill probs bring up polygmy lol...
itll go something like this
me: sooo, what do ya think of polygymy
him: yeah *nods head in agreement*
me: what do you think of polygamy :mad:
him : o-o-one wifes good oh:
Me: is that a statement or a question: :mad:
him: s-s-statement
me:
btw i anit anti polygamy or polygamists, BUT i would be anti being a co-wife
...desperate for husnul-khitaam...
please make dua that Allah grants me a good end (to my life). please make dua that Allah guides me.
I have a potential partner coming tonight. . . he's only been muslim 6 yrs, any ideas for questions????
ask him why he wants to marry you
and ask him why you should marry him
....or you could play the shy game
you know how it is, face down, red cheeks, all giggling, he tries speak n ur like "tee hee" and his like "lol the hek?" :|... seen it happen too many times
-
My tears testify that i have a heart
yet i feel me and shaytan never part
-
I have a potential partner coming tonight. . . he's only been muslim 6 yrs, any ideas for questions????
That would depend on what's important to you, sis. What qualities are you looking for/dislike? Think about that, and then think of ways that you can ask questions about those things. Do you have any specific plans for the future, like making hijrah? What do you expect from a husband?
You could also ask him these sort of questions, to see if you'd be compatible for him.
Ok heres my questions, originally before this thread,
1- What do you want in a wife?
2- way of dress?
3- daily salaah?
4- Work?
5- Where your intention of living is?
6- he intermingle freely with women?
7- particular dislikes
8- >..?
(1) What makes him angry and how does he deal with his anger?
Does he blame everybody but himself?
Does he stop talking to the person involved?
Does he bear grudges ("I'll get him back one day!")
Has he ever physically or mentally abused anyone with whom he was angry?
Does he get angry when those who may be wiser disagree or suggest an alternative point of view?
Does he ever forgive those with whom he was angry?
(2) How does he behave during a crisis?
Does he blame everyone except himself?
Does he become hostile towards an uninvolved member of an ethnic group which is known to abuse followers of Islam?
What steps does he take to face and deal with pressure?
Does he remain optimistic that things will get better, and that after every difficulty comes ease?
(3) How does he feel about women's rights in a Muslim home?
Did he ever observe abuse from his father towards his mother?
Did he ever act to prevent abuse at home? How?
Did he believe that his father was always right?
Does he believe that all women deserve abuse?
How does he make decisions? Does he rely on his own wisdom? Does he consult with close friends?
Will he be willing to consult with his spouse on any decision?
Does he stick firmly to his decisions?
(4) How does he deal with money matters?
Does he save his money for the future?
Does he give money to charities?
When he decides to buy something, will he consult his spouse in making the decision?
How does he describe his own spending and attitude towards money?
(5) What does he expect from his wife and children?
How would he react if his expectations are not met?
What is his vision of family life?
Would he pitch in and co-operate in family chores and the upbringing of children?
Would he be willing to change to accommodate your views?
(6) What are his family like?
Are his family religious, or will you be the only one in hijab?
Does their approach to Islam differ from yours - will you be the only "fundamentalists" in a family whose Islam is more "traditional"?
If this is a mixed match, are his folks open to outsiders, or will you face clannishness and exclusion?
(7) What is his medical background?
(Many Imams in the US are now refusing to conduct Nikah until they see proof that the couple have undergone blood tests and been given a clean bill of health)
Has he ever had an AIDS test, and what was the result?
Is there any history of major illness in his family?
(8) What are his views on education of women and children?
Will he allow you to continue and/or return to education?
What are his views on education and schooling of children? If you have strong views on Islamic schools, home schooling, etc., find out if his views coincide with yours.
Will he take part in the children's upbringing and education? Will he teach them Qur'an?
(9) Where does he want to live?
Does he want to settle in the country where you now live?
Does he want to return to his homeland? Does he want to move to a new country altogether?
Will the family have to move frequently because of his profession?
Will he take your feelings into account when deciding where to live?
Does he aspire to a large and luxurious home, or will he settle for less? Does he want to live in the heart of the city, in the suburbs, or in an isolated rural setting?
Day-to-day matters
Some of these are individual preferences - what may deeply concern some may not even be an issue to others, but if you have some strong feelings on a matter, it is better to get it out into the open before you make a commitment:
(1) Food:
Do you agree on the "halal meat" issue - some people will only eat halal-slaughtered meat, whilst others will eat any "meat of the Jews and Christians" as long as it's not pork.
Does he insist on only eating the food of his own ethnic group, or are his tastes more eclectic?
Will he insist on having every meal cooked from scratch, or will you be able to have convenience food or take-away on busy days?
Does he have some strong preferences for meat, or will you "go vegetarian" some days?
(2) Smoking:
Does he smoke? Do any of his family or friends smoke? Will he let people smoke in your non-smoking home?
(3) Going Out:
How does he feel about women going outside the home? studying outside? working outside?
Will he want to "check out" your friends and only let you visit those of whom he approves?
How does he feel about women driving?
(4) Pets:
Are either of you very keen to keep pets at home?
Do either of you have any allergies, dislikes, or phobias when it comes to animals?
Honestly, really keeping that list and questioning him will definitely scare him away! lol.
[QUOTE=Amatul Wadud;1056487]Ur siggy is amazing sis!
(1) Food:
Do you agree on the "halal meat" issue - some people will only eat halal-slaughtered meat, whilst others will eat any "meat of the Jews and Christians" as long as it's not pork.
Does he insist on only eating the food of his own ethnic group, or are his tastes more eclectic?
Will he insist on having every meal cooked from scratch, or will you be able to have convenience food or take-away on busy days?
Does he have some strong preferences for meat, or will you "go vegetarian" some days?
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you will need a week to get answers to all those questions
:mad:
oh:
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