Lost Iman (faith) after dua rejected and failed exams

[melly4]

السَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ

I got my exam results yesterday, and I did awfully. As a result, I've literally lost all my Iman. I feel like I did so much: woke up for tahujjud consistently for over a month, kept 20 fasts, started praying the full Salahs (including sunnahs and nafls rather than just fardh), stopped using social media and talking to boys even in a friendly context, started dressing more modestly, reading at least 3 pages of Quran daily, stopped listening to music etc. I made a promise to myself that if I did do well in my exams, I would continue doing these things for as long as possible inshaAllah

I said to Allah that if I do badly in my exams, i WILL lose my faith, and unfortunately that has happened. It's currently Dhuhr time and I have no motivation to get up and pray, and I know that when I finally do I won't even pray the Sunnah rakahs, just the 4 fardh.

Why did Allah reject my dua??? It doesn't seem fair at all!! I tried SOOO hard to become a way better Muslim in order for it to be accepted, and it just seems so unfair that I failed after all that. I went from having a gut feeling that I would do bad, to having a feeling that I would do good and pass exceedingly after I read all my tahujjud prayers. Now I have no religious motivation because Im thinking that I am a bad muslim and thats why my dua was rejected, or that there is no point in praying if my duas never get accepted.

What can i do to stop this feeling and raise my eman again? Or is there anyone else out there whose dua wasnt accepted and they ended up in a much better, happier position? If so, please share your story!

Jazakh Allah Khair
Melika

 

[404]

I made a promise to myself that if I did do well in my exams, I would continue doing these things for as long as possible inshaAllah

I said to Allah that if I do badly in my exams, i WILL lose my faith, and unfortunately that has happened.

Reflect on this and I think you will find your answer.

You're intention is in the wrong place. You weren't intending to be a good Muslim for the sake of pleasing Allah, but rather for the sake of getting something in return (ie. passing the exam). You gave Allah the ultimatum that if you pass, you will continue to do acts of worship, otherwise, you will turn your back on Him. Just know that all those who call themselves believers will be tested in order to filter out the hypocrites from the true believers. You need to re-evaluate your faith and understand why it is you believe in Islam.

حَسِبَ النَّاسُ أَن يُتْرَكُوا أَن يَقُولُوا آمَنَّا وَهُمْ لَا يُفْتَنُونَ
“Do the people think that they will be left to say, “We believe” and they will not be tried?”
Quran 29:2

وَلَنَبْلُوَنَّكُم بِشَيْءٍ مِّنَ الْخَوْفِ وَالْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ الْأَمْوَالِ وَالْأَنفُسِ وَالثَّمَرَاتِ ۗ وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابِرِينَ
“And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient.”
Quran 2:155
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[Alpha Dude]

Wa alaykum salam,

To address the most important problem first: know that, we do not pray, fast and do good deeds because of some perceived benefit to Allah. No, it is for our own benefit and gain. So, to "warn" or "give an ultimatum" to Allah - the lord of all the worlds, only harms us. Iblis does not disbelieve in the existence of Allah yet he is still going to hell. This is down to his downright arrogance in refusing to accept the will of Allah over him. This is what your behaviour is akin to. Allah has put a circumstance in your life that you are not appreciative of, and so you will arrogantly, defiantly not worship him as he should be worshipped. So, it's not because you do not believe in him, but out of some kind of arrogance on your part. This is a great evil. If you carry on down this way of thinking, please be scared, lest Allah causes the eyes of your heart to become blind to the truth forever. In such a case, you would be of the losers in the hereafter.

You are young so what I'm going to say now, you will not really appreciate. Maybe when you are a decade or so older you will learn to reflect and will realise: Life is short. 60-70 years perhaps on average you might say people live for. We are told that life in this world is like a drop in the ocean compared to the hereafter. So, to throw away the hereafter out of rebellion because things did no go the way you demanded of Allah (by way of threat of disbelieving), is an extremely foolish thing to do.

Allah has all knowledge and understanding and knows what is best for us. Always look at your life circumstances with that lens. Nothing is coincidence. It happens for a reason. We need to learn to be content. Not too happy when something goes our way, or too sad when things do not go our way.

You failed your tests or did not get the results you wanted. Perhaps this will cause you to not get into the further education establishment that you had your eyes set on. Now, a good approach on this kind of thing happening is to not get despondent, but think to yourself, that maybe the thing that did not happen as you wished was actually bad for you in some way. Assume that Allah has saved you from something that you do not know of. It is in fact mentioned in a hadith that all duas are accepted, in different forms. Either Allah will quickly accept your dua, or he will save it for the hereafter or he will remove something bad from happening in your life.

There's many examples you can think of in your circumstance. Let's get imaginative. Imagine that instead you gained all the good results you wanted and ended up getting accepted into the university you wished to go to. Then 6 months down the line, you are commuting to your campus. That day, you are driving up the motorway and a truck veers into your lane having not seen you, crushing you against the side of the road. You are now badly injured and paralysed for life. See? This is one such random possibility that Allah could have saved you from. Obviously, we don't know exactly but the point I'm making is that you need to have a positive outlook on Allah. Whatever happens, has happened for the best. Allah will not desert you, if you have this strong mindset. How can anything hurt you?

Lastly, remember that life is a test. You will never find utopia here. There will always be ups and down. No person has everything in their life that is good. Everyone is facing a problem in one form or another, to varying degrees. If we all were to pray and be on our best behaviour with Allah, even then, that does not mean we will live a life of comfort. What would be the point of the test of life, then? Hardships are part and parcel of life. We need to learn to deal with them in an appropriate manner.

May Allah make things easy for you. Aameen.

 

[- Qatada -]

I prayed alot too but I failed in my a level exams.

Then my parents said I have to get married (which I didn't like either)

10years later I have my own family and kids alhamdulilah and I'm happy

"It may be that you dislike a thing and it is good for you. Allah knows and you do not know..” (Quran 2:216)

 

[Abu Fauzi]

As-Salaam alaikum,
Sister Melika, honorable Members of the Forum have already spoken and advised you (and all of us) in their contributions above following your concern....and I concur with what they said. I only want to add that YOU should be ashamed in front of Allah Ta'ala, our LORD. Do not worship Him, hoping for PARADISE as a REWARD, and be a BAD labourer: If you are given your wage you work, and if you are not given it, you do NOT work. We must worship Allah because He Deserves to be worshiped..as the One and Only Creator.

 

[Ghost1987]

As-Salaam alaikum,
Sister Melika, honorable Members of the Forum have already spoken and advised you (and all of us) in their contributions above following your concern....and I concur with what they said. I only want to add that YOU should be ashamed in front of Allah Ta'ala, our LORD. Do not worship Him, hoping for PARADISE as a REWARD, and be a BAD labourer: If you are given your wage you work, and if you are not given it, you do NOT work. We must worship Allah because He Deserves to be worshiped..as the One and Only Creator.

SubhanAllah

Thank you abu fauzi that advice as applied to me solved half my mental relationship with God